I am thankful for the roof over my head. I scored a very cute apartment in downtown Montreal for a good price.

I am thankful for the food in my stomach and in my fridge.

I am thankful for the friends and family that I do have relationships with.

I am thankful to have Bebe in my life. A very gentle, appreciative, and kind soul.


I am thankful for getting a taste of the dark side of human nature during the last 3 years of my life. Thankful for the lessons.

♡🐾 Bebe 🐾♡


A few weeks ago I adopted Bebe. Her original name was Sybelle but this did not come naturally to me. When I saw the ad I thought of Mimi but when I met her and began to speak to her Bebe (“Bee bee”) just came out. I looked it up later and learned that the name Bebe means “She who brings happiness.” So that worked out very well because that is exactly what she has done for me.

I was unsure about getting another cat, I don’t know where I am going with my life so I was thinking that having a cat may not be the best decision for me at this time… Despite the uncertainty I did look on Kijiji for adult cats to be re-homed… then I started looking specifically at Persian cats since I both love that breed AND my apartment is a small one bedroom and I felt an adult Persian would be the best match for this environment. A cat or kitten with a lot of energy would not enjoy this space.

I was starting to lean more on the “No” side and looking less… then I saw the ad for Bebe. I smiled instantly when I saw her. I responded the Kijiji ad and went to sleep, still with doubts of having a cat. I dreamt of her that night, just I had dreamt of this apartment when I had initially decided not to take it. It was the dream of having this apartment that made me go for it and now it was my dream of Bebe and I in this apartment that made me feel I was on the right path and that she was mine.

No one responded to the Kijiji ad but I saw that it was posted by a shelter so I found their Facebook page and messaged them. They said that another woman had already expressed interest in Bebe and that they were waiting to hear back from her. I waited a few weeks and in the end the woman did not answer so they contacted me and made the arrangements to bring her to me. I was so excited and nervous that night as I waited for Bebe’s arrival. When she came out of the carrier I was delighted by her little self. She looked a bit bigger in the picture. She is actually a petite little lady. She explored a bit while the shelter lady was here and ended up hiding under my dresser. After the lady left I laid on the floor beside the dresser and spoke to her. After a couple minutes she came out with her tail up.

It is a bit less than a month later now that I have had her and I love her. She is 6 years old and is a friendly little lady. She loves the petted and brushed. She will sometimes wait in the bathroom while I shower. She follows me around and stares at me, if she is not sitting or laying beside me. She sleeps with me every night and usually right by my head! She also has her playful side which enjoys my homemade crumpled aluminum foil balls!

She is an Exotic aka the Short-hair Persian, a mix between Persian and American Shorthair. The shelter lady is supposed to come back at some point for a follow up and for me to sign the contract. She will explain more of Bebe’s history to me then. All I know of her at this point is that she has been in several homes due to her leaky eyes. Her eyes, and sometimes nose, need to be cleaned multiple times a day due to her brachycephalic head/flat face.  Learning more about Persians and the Exotic specifically makes me even more of a fan! Such a sweet and loyal breed. Not many are up for adoption so I feel very lucky to have found her.

Bebe with my favorite “plush” growing up; Snowy the white blue eyed Persian. A “kitty kitty kitten” toy.

The Middle Way

The following is an excerpt from The Laws of the Sun by Ryuho Okawa which I really enjoyed.

When I first started reading this book I felt it was silly; talking about beings on Venus before Earth for example, however I kept going and I actually I am glad that I read it. It overall is a very uplifting and inspirational read.

The exact thoughts of Gautama Siddhartha had at the time of his great awakening:

“For many years, I barely ate or drank. I have practiced asceticism, believing that I could attain a great spiritual awakening by mortifying my flesh to its limit. Six years have passed since I left my wife, Yashodhara, and my son, Rahula, and fled from Kapilavastu Palace, rejecting the pleas of my father, King Suddhodana, that I succeed him to the throne. When I lived in that palace, I was strong and vigorous, adept at both military and literary arts. But look at me now. I am just skin and bone. If our purpose in life were to excoriate and torment our bodies, then what would be the point of dwelling in physical bodies at all? If the Eternal Buddha wished for human beings to deny the flesh, wouldn’t that imply that those who commit suicide are the most enlightened ones?

“But what is the benefit of suicide? According to the universal law of cause and effect, if we create seeds of suffering by committing suicide, then suffering is what we’ll reap. The state of enlightenment is a state of tranquility, but how can we possible attain such peace of mind through the torments of asceticism? Torturing my physical body this way is none other than a way to kill myself, and this is not a way to enlightenment. The only result I have achieved through this practice is an attitude of severity. My eyes are passing harsh judgments and show no love or mercy. How can I truly be kind and compassionate if I can’t find peace of mind or fill my own heart with happiness?

“What exactly is the happiness that I can find within myself? When I lived as a prince in Kapilavastu Palace, I had all the money, women, and luxuries that I could ask for. But was my heart filled with happiness? No, my monotonous life was filled with languor. My heart was empty and my mind was racked with conflicts, inflamed by other people’s desires and intentions. Had I inherited the throne, it would have been my duty to lead my people to war against neighboring countries, causing terrible bloodshed and death.

“A life lived in pursuit of wordy status and fame can only bring hollowness. My life in Kapilavastu Palace was not a life of true happiness. I felt spiritually unfulfilled, and I lived in constant anxiety and frustration. We find true happiness not in stagnation and laziness but in daily spiritual progress. Happiness is found not in worldly success, but in the improvement of our souls and the refinement of our divine nature. We children of the Eternal Buddha experience true happiness when we improve ourselves according to His Will.

“As children of the Eternal Buddha, we can find the path to enlightenment and true happiness neither in the extravagant life of royalty nor in the structures of ascetic training; we can find peace of mind neither in hedonistic excess nor the harshest privation. The right way of living for human beings is to abandon both extremes and to seek the Truths in the Middle Way. Only when we live a balanced life can we find the Middle Way.

“What we truly seek as human beings is a life of perfect harmony. We can create a world of perfect harmony, a kingdom of Heaven, within our mind when we abandon the extremes of pain and pleasure, enter the Middle Way, and practice the Eightfold Path of Right View, Right Thought, Right Speech, Right Action, Right Livelihood, Right Effort, Right Mindfulness, and Right Concentration. When all of us do this, the kingdom of Heaven will appear on Earth.

“Thus, true happiness is to be found in experiencing joy and making spiritual progress in our daily lives. We can increase this spiritual joy by understanding and mastering the Eightfold Path.”


I could certainly learn a lot from following the Eightfold path. It seems like a great guideline to living a fulfilling life…


I’ve been lying on my balcony for the past couple of hours. I made myself a little bed up here and I have been looking around and thinking. This is my third apartment with a balcony in a row, yet despite only being here for a month now I have appreciated this balcony most of all. It is my first time back out here in a couple of days. I had food poisoning and was not able to move much in that time. I am much better now. Now it is just to get back into eating without upsetting my recovering stomach. So far so good.

…Fall is gorgeous and I love it too but my favorite time of the year is summer evenings. The temperature is just right at that time and I am enjoying it here on my balcony.

White Moth

Rest in peace beautiful one. ••♡•♡•♡••

I looked up the symbolism of white moths and for a lot of cultures a white moth means death of a loved one, they also can represent souls, some believe them to be souls that are living, some believe dead, other believe them to be unrested souls saying their final goodbye. However, the symbolism of death and the moth seem to be if one flys into your house or is at the very least alive. This one was not. So I decided to look further into it.

Death in general means transitions. Change, progression, and phases. The place, time and weather when you come across a dead animal can impact its meaning as well. I found her in a flower pot with living plants on my balcony today. Sunny with a bit of rain. I felt good when I saw her, I felt like I found a treasure or a gift.

Moths in general can mean determination, fragility, clairvoyance, and psychic abilities.

Also, to keep in mind, white in general is the color to represent purity and as well as everything (all colors of light add up to white). And the damaged wing would play a role in its meaning as well.

It is also a nocturnal creature. This can be about moving forward by the use of other senses and other means than by going based on what I see directly. Going about in the darkness and letting my intuition guide me…

When interpreting the meaning of this dead animal I have to reflect on what is going on in my life to understand its message… I won’t share the details of what I believe this message to mean exactly, but I will say that for me it is a message of change and renewal overall. I see it as positive.

I don’t think I would have seen it as a symbol if I had seen it at another time but today I felt it was and was curious to investigate. Looking into what it meant and what is actually going on for me now makes me believe that it is a message for me, a good one.