The past called and told me to tell you to get the fuck over it!!

Something us past dwellers need to read.

Stop complaining about the past and move the fuck on!

Life is short, live in the present and look forward to the future.

☀️ Fresh Start ☀️

IMG_20180504_190834506_5

As those of you who know me and whoever has read this blog know I am trying to make productive changes in my life.

Recently I got a gym membership, a new tattoo, my boyfriend gave me a beautiful ring, and I shaved off my hair! All symbols of self improvement, a new beginning, & love.

I have tried to start fresh many times and have relapsed each time so far. I do expect to have my days where I feel bad and don’t eat as much, it has already happened, but I intend to not let those days keep me down. This time is the first time I am going to the gym. This will make a difference. I was nervous at first but my boyfriend has been going with me and showing me the ropes! It’s actually kinda fun 🙂

I am trying to visualize myself heavier and I keep a bathing suit up on the wall for me to see everyday so that I am reminded of my weight gain goal. It would be a dream come true to be able to be comfortable enough in my body to wear a swimsuit! The last time I was in a swimsuit was when I was 13 years old, I am now 27!

I have gained a couple of pounds in the last couple of weeks. However, in the past few days I worked more and ate less. My mood shifted in the negative as well. It has been very dark and rainy too and my thoughts began to match the weather. Tonight I am doing laundry and waiting for my friend from out of town to arrive. I just ordered a pizza. I will take some Apetamin, a vitamin syrup that helps stimulate an appetite and slows down your metabolism, and eat as much as I can.

We may not always see it but the sun is always shining.

Thank you to everyone for the positive feedback on my posts so far!

Cheers from Canada

❤ 🙂

IMG_20180430_215339789_2

IMG_20180504_105631_2
 And… a jacket my boyfriends mother gave to me! ❤