Want to feel better? Then make it happen. Sitting around complaining and blaming others will only make you feel worse. And if it somehow makes you feel better, know that any pleasure gained from placing blame elsewhere is temporary and is not productive.
Even if your negative emotions/reaction to another’s negative behavior is justified YOU must make the choice to not let that negativity stay within you. It will slowly destroy you.
Own up to the responsibility of taking care of yourself. It won’t be easy but anything of any value to growth will never be easy. That is just how it works. That is why we tend to blame too…because it is easy. Well guess what, the easy way is usually the wrong way!
You can do it, take up the challenge and go the right way… start growing! ♡
If you have/are experiencing being bullied; the first and more important thing to recognize is that it is not your fault.
They are taking out their issues out on you. Maybe they too were bullied and/or abused in some way. Some people cope with stress in a negative way and hurt others as a result. It could be a coping method for whatever it is they are going through/have been through. Maybe they are angry and insecure. They could also possibly be jealous.
Most of the time bullying is done to have power and control over someone else. They will target something specific about you to create or worsen your existing insecurities.
They are most likely people of low self esteem and use bullying as a way of deflecting, and many times and more specifically; projeting their flaws onto someone else. There is a good chance that whatever they are pointing out that is wrong with you is something they are insecure about with themselves. They are not happy people.
Bullying is never okay but understanding why it is being done can help tremendously in the healing process. ♡
Why Do People Bully? The Scientific Reasons
Something us past dwellers need to read.
Stop complaining about the past and move the fuck on!
Life is short, live in the present and look forward to the future.
Treat yourself to gifts, dates and adventures.
Don’t wait on people to these with or for you.
They say you spend a third of your life sleeping, well I’m pretty sure I’ve spent another third just on waiting on others and at least half of the time it was for nothing. That is what it feels like. It’s been like that for as long as I can remember. Different people over the years. It’s something I’ve been resentful about for a long time for the time wasted and feeling let down. Now, I am trying to let go and just enjoy life.
I was browsing Pinterest and came across this image:
Source of Image
These 8 factors were found during a study on happiness by Duke University.
I find these factors quite useful for self reflection and felt a need to share!
Personal take on these factors:
- The absence of suspicion and resentment. I hold grudges for years. Time to let go! This is a big one for me and will most likely take a while for me to master it.
- Not living in the past. I spend too much time in the past. So much time wasted that could instead be spent in the present and planning for the future.
- Not wasting time and energy fighting conditions you cannot change. Yes… Go with the flow, man.
- Force yourself to stay involved with the living world. Yes when I am unhappy I curl into a ball in bed and don’t eat or want to speak to anyone. The last few times I felt down I watched educational and thought provoking videos on YouTube instead. Now that is nice out I will go for more walks!
- Refuse to indulge in self-pity. Hmm.. self-pity. I don’t really pity myself. I am aware that I am lucky to have a roof over my head, food to eat and family and friends that love me. Instead of self-pity I have had a bad habit of just insulting myself for letting negative feelings take over and for wasting so much time being stuck instead of being productive. I’m looking at the definition of self pity and I don’t think it is the same thing. I am aware that I am fortunate and I don’t pity myself. I’ve just been angry and annoyed with myself.
- Cultivate the old-fashioned virtues–love, humor, compassion and loyalty. Yes I will continue to improve on them as well as other virtues; assertiveness, confidence, courage, creativity, peacefulness, purposefulness, responsibility, and self-discipline. I’m overall trying to work on becoming a more virtuous individual.
- Do not expect too much of yourself. Yes, this one will be important when I go back to school in the Fall. I am too hard on myself if I don’t get an A.
- Find something bigger than yourself to believe in. I have some ideas but I will have to think about this one some more. 🙂